I think I've had it backwards all this time. Always thinking to myself, 'I've got a lot going for me, so what's the deal?'. Then today I had an epiphany, I'm not a catch! Because the definition of 'catch' has changed. An ex of mine, who once upon a time I thought was the end of my companion search, turned out to be an unfaithful ass who has now been with the same girl since shortly after we broke up - about 3 years. I learned through mutual sources that both of them have the tendency to stray - so maybe they're made for each other. In quoting another male I've had the (dis)pleasure of being around the last couple years, he "likes to have to take care of somebody, be able to pick up the pieces", of her broken, shallow, dependant, selfish, pathetic life I'm assuming. And another friend of mine made the decision to move in with his girlfriend, who also has a hobby of putting another notch in the bedpost.
As much as guys gripe, and complain about their significant others - I think deep down they must enjoy it. Because I can't even count on my fingers and toes how many times I've looked at a relationship objectively and wondered why they'd rather settle with SO much needless dysfunction. Women who are materialistic, controlling, unfaithful messes who have not one ounce of self respect and dignity and are as shallow as the salt flats in Utah.
Me? I'm none of these things, though I may not always have 100% confidence in myself - I know I am smart woman who is warm and caring and probably more loyal than 90% of the population. I like to enjoy life and the people I'm with, I'm very open minded and feel happiness in doing things that make the person I love happy.
Maybe there's some level of comfort in the fact they have a valid excuse to bail when their fear of commitment settles in. Or perhaps they're just afraid of the razzing they'll get when all the guys are bitching about their women and a buddy asks them about their love life and they can actually say "You know what? I love my girlfriend/wife - she's an amazing person".
So men, quit being (for lack of a better word) pussies, man up and give a real women a chance, a woman of substance, someone who can give you a run for your money - it'll make life a lot more interesting and you'll feel much more fulfilled, take my word for it.
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4 comments:
Ugh this is sad but SO true. I recall a conversation I had with TFDH and he told me he always goes after girls who are fragile which is why he never wanted to go out with me. I knew at that moment I was in for a real uphill battle. Such is the reason I'm fairly confident that I'll have to move to another city if I want to find a good man. In Milwaukee, every decent guy is shacked up and the rest are a bunch of mopester generals.
Exactly - who would have thought that they'd rather go for fragile women with all this baggage and severe personality disorders. Bunch of babies....
Ladies, you're missing another possibility: women that have it all together can intimidate a guy...at least the kind who is NOT so together but also has an ego and wants to think he is. Fortunately, I think as guys mature and DO get life figured out, they pick up a little self-esteem and therefore are more open to being with non-dysfunctional women. I've seen it happen quite a few times. Hang on for the slightly older guys! And the "already shacked up" slightly older guys figuring out their dysfunctional partners are not such a great idea.
This is very true. I know it's more of a waiting game than anything. Because the women I know who HAVE found themselves good guys found older guys...many of whom are divorced. You pretty much just have to wait for them to pick the wrong girl, marry her, realize she's a train wreck, get divorced, and then when they meet women like us they'll fall totally in love because we're so mature and together :)
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