I got a fever!

Awake. 12:45am. Bright idea. Drink Coffee at 9pm. 9348567 cups. Watching old SNL. Laugh. Will Ferrel = love.



Or maybe I can't sleep because someone's hosting a game show in the apartment next to mine. Come on down!!!! You're the next contestant on SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M TRYING TO SLEEP I DON'T CARE THAT IT'S SATURDAY!!!

Robert GOOUUULLEETTTTTT.

zwei blogs im eine tage!?!?!?

Ok so I don't know the German word for 'blog' and I probably didn't even construct that sentence correctly - but - 2 blogs in one day!?!!? Sometimes it happens, and really, this blog is about absolutely nothing.

I'm a little loopy at 8:14pm on Wednesday evening. You see Wednesday is taco night at the knights of columbus in South Milwaukee. 75 cent soft tacos, $1.50 hard shell tacos and BOGO drinks, it's been a family thing for the past 2 months or so and in short - our final bill for the entire group is about $5....excluding drinks, and that's for 4 of us. If J comes it's about $7. Dirt cheap! And the tacos are delicious, you'd be stupid to pass it up. A woman we bowl with on our couples league is a bartender there and already knows our drink order when we arrive shortly after work - long island, long beach and a rum and coke. And since she's a friend of ours, feels obligated to make it as strong as possible. No complaints, but a long island even stronger than it already is!?? Buzzed after 3 sucks from the straw. So usually I head home with mom a bit in the bag and feeling good. Tonight I arrive home, flip on the boob tube and discover one of my all time favorite movies is on - Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, circa 1990. I dont know what it is about this movie, it's probably just the nostalgia of it all and bringing me back in time to the days as a carefree kid - but it makes me feel good. And as I'm sitting here, enjoying the rubbery turtle costumes, April O' Neil's fluffy permed 80's hairdo and Corey Feldman's voice as Donatello - I can't help but think something's missing. Right, it's my Jack Daniels. Now - I don't normally drink alone, on my fucked up lopsided couch, on a Wednesday night - but this is a special occasion! TMNT is on TV! Plus, the Gods must have had it in store because usually I'd have nothing to mix with the precious last few ounces of my JD - I'm not a soda drinker, but it just so happens that J is. I've got a 18 pack of diet coke in the fridge with his name on it (ugh, the poison I keep in my home for him ;-)). Perfect! The last swig of Jack to celebrate Michaelangelo, Raphael, Donatello and Leonardo in all their glory. J despises Mr. Daniels anyway - it's only fitting to suck down the remaining drops in his absence, right? RIGHT!?!?!?

This is the dumbest blog I've ever written.

It's Did-You-Know Wednesday!

Well, the first one anyway - I've decided that we need a little pick-me-up every week after two Mondays in a row - hence the birth of Did-You-Know Wednesday. Onward!

In my previous post about Taft's tubby bitchass, I mentioned as a young child around the age of 10 or so I had a book about all the Presidents. Well in my recent weekend visit to my parent's house to steal some food while they were at the Packer game, I found that little lost treasure! Sure enough, the first paragraph in Taft's section mentions the bathtub. But enough about that - I bring you today's fun fact.

Did you know, that James Buchanan (the fifteenth President) started the faux hawk trend? See for yourself.



The Pony Express was also formed during his presidency to deliver mail to the west coast. We also found out last year that The Pony Express was also used to deliver black toner to C-K for our printer on the 5th floor (it seriously took weeks!). Rock on Jimmy B!

This post made possible by Our American Presidents: From Washington through Clinton by Joan Bumann and John Patterson, and the ahead-of-his-time stylings of James "JB" Buchanan.


(Please note: this is the shitty version through Bush, I have the better version through Clinton - it was 5 cents more)

Hugh love me! Hugh really love me!!!

Happy new Monday!



Not only has the glorious fall begun, but fresh new seasons of my favorite shows are taking over my DVR. HOUSE STARTS TONIGHT! I'm rather excited, as if you couldn't tell. Not only is the show totally captivating, with the wide variety of interesting diseases, infections, symptoms and patients - but Hugh Laurie is a thing of beauty. The man can be the most narcissistic asshat to ever exist all the while putting patient's lives in danger and I would still shove him into a stairwell and have my way with him.

Another reason I have a soft spot in my heart for him, is that he made an appearance on Friends, my favorite show of all time. And even then, was a total asshole! Love.



In other news (and totally validating my blog name) - I had a very interesting morning. I did some wash last night and put my jeans in the dryer before I went to bed - so this morning I went to the dryer after my shower to get a pair. Well, I picked out a pair I bought from Aeropostale about a year ago and in putting them on, realized there was about a quarter size rip/hole in the ass - right by the corner of the back pocket. So, I threw them into my room to deal with them later - because I'm going to fix them.

I then go back to the dryer to get another pair and pick out a pair of Mossimo jeans I got from Target over a year ago. Well these pants have always been a little tighter and shrink more than my other jeans in the dryer so when I put them on I have to do a series of twists and bends to loosen them up a bit. So I begin to put them on in my room and do a squat of sorts and hear a loud, cartoonlike rrrriiiiiiippppppppppppppp, and feel a bit of a draft as my right asscheek explodes out the back of my pants. WHAT. THE. FUCK. I literally said this out loud as I furiously kicked them off and proceeded to grab said rip and pull as hard as I could basically taking off the whole right leg in a fit of frustration. Then I started to laugh and made yet another trip to the dryer to get one more pair of jeans and carefully inspect them so they don't explode off my body when I get to work. But this is now the third pair of jeans that have ripped in the ass! I had a pair of my favorite AE jeans rip right across the ass last winter, and those weren't even tight! And actually as I'm typing this - I'm realizing all three pairs have ripped along the right side. Is my right asscheek substantially larger than the left?!?!!? Just call me L.A. from now on, for LOPSIDED ASS. Now I'm gonna have to have my jeans specially made on the internet for size 4 with the right side a size 6. Stupid body.

ah well, lesson learned

So I'm not even sure how many people saw my last post - about my photo on the popphoto website, but I banished it to cyberspace. Apparently the whole critique-ing section of that blog is a joke - I say joke, as in these 'contributing bloggers' probably have no more credentials than I to be offering advice in the world of photography. I guess I was just too caught up in the fact that I had a good review - but after finding out it basically means next to nothing, there's no point in sharing it with the world.

Photography is subjective, not objective - and while some of the reviewers practiced that, most did not (and neither did a lot of the people taking the time to make their comments). And upon finding out there was a comments section below the posts (which I did not know until KT pointed it out, because I can't read) I checked them out. Brought the glee down a notch...or 10. I couldn't tell if these people just really disliked my photo, or had been ripped apart themselves by one of the blogger's critiques and couldn't understand why a "pretty picture of an ugly flower" got any praise. While I did agree with some of the comment-ers points on either the photo itself (the tip of the petal cut off at the bottom) or the blogger's critique (I also felt she lightened it a little too much), I thought it was a pretty good capture. It's a macro shot of a flower, it is what it is, it's not some picture of some starving children in Africa getting their first meal after 3 months. But again, going back to my earlier statement - unless you're talking about technical fixes like shutter speed, aperture, DOF etc - all you're going to have is a bunch of opinions...so...take it with a grain of salt?

I was just interested to see what more experienced people would have to say about a photo I snapped on vacation - it's not like it was hand-picked for the cover of National Geographic. And in looking at the comments of the other photos picked for a critique it seems pretty similar across the board - if the photo was given a high rating, people questioned why - if the photo was given a low rating, people questioned why. So thanks to those for thinking it was a 'nice' photo and offering some constructive criticism - and no, I do not know the person who critiqued my photo personally as according to one person, there's no other reason there'd be "such praise for such an ordinary photo" - maybe she just likes flowers? But I did agree with his/her last statement - "Your critiques are no more than your opinion and your opinion is no better than mine."

In conclusion, only you can decide if your photo is worthy of a desktop background. In the meantime, I'm going to keep on taking pictures of ordinary things.

Pewpies

Anyone who knows me, knows that I love the word poop. It's just funny to me and no matter how much that makes me seem forever immature - I don't care. It's a great word, as is any derivative of the word poop, like poopies. I find it cute when men or women of any age say it. Of course, almost any words that come out of a two or three year olds mouth is going to be cute - but I almost find it endearing when an adult man says 'poopies'.

It could also be the only reason I like the movie On Golden Pond - YOU OLD POOP!

All that ridiculousness being said - I need this.

Oh, Hair....O'Hare?

Such a lovely foggy Thursday it is - lovely because I get to escape my cube cell at noon.

J's brother is coming home today from his stint in Alaska so I'm tagging along for the ride to Chicago to pick him up. While we're not walking the city streets of Chitown, or gazing up at the glorious Hancock Building (ok maybe only I do that, it's one of my fave's) - we ARE going to a massive international airport, perfect for people watching - one of my hobbies. We may not even be there long enough to get a good session in - but even a brisk walk through the airport will give you enough to write a book.

I'm off to plug my meter - the joys of parking in dtown Milwaukee.

'Calm down, it's never the first one!'

This is amazing. That's all I have to say.

www.collegehumor.com/video:1770138

Oh, Taft - you and your big ass

Happy Monday....again.

So, a new director started in here in PR yesterday - the powers that be decided it would be fun for him to fill out a get-to-know-him survey of sorts and one of the questions was: What was your favorite president? His answer? LBJ - which I was proud to know stood for Lyndon Baines (Ok I didn't know his middle name was Baines, but I did know that it was B...obviously) Johnson, I even knew the approximate term he served! Hey, I'm an old lady no longer in school so past president information kinda slips to the dusty crevices of my brain...but I digress. Upon knowing LBJ, I started to remember a couple random facts about some presidents, i.e Nixon and "I am not a crook", Reagan and....well I just like Reagan because he's so cute, and was in term when yours truly entered this world. But then I remembered something about some president being really fat and not fitting into the bathtub and having a special tub made and what have you. You see around age 11 I was into Presidents and had this book on all Presidents up until the current one (which was Clinton) and it had 2 or 3 pages of info about each one - their term, fun facts - and apparently how fat they were. I knew that it started with a 'T', and I kept thinking Truman - but knew that wasn't it. So then I googled "fat president tub", exactly in that order, and it all came screaming back, it was Taft. Good ol' 400 pounds of fun William Howard Taft. THEN, the Heavens opened up and sent me this little nugget.



Which immediately put Z and I into a fit of laughter. It's perfect - I've even printed it out and hung it in my cubicle. And then it came to me - this would be the perfect skit on Conan, much like In The Year 2000, where "FAT PRESIDENT" would be repeated like "in the year 2000" is in the aforementioned skit - however - in that low, movie trailer-esque voice, and the image above would flash on screen.

For example

Conan: Because President Taft was so ginormous, he had to have a special tub made for him installed in the White House.
(movie trailer-esque voice): FAT PRESIDENT ::show picture above::

Then continue with another fact, and so on and so forth.

Ok so it's not as funny on paper as it is my head, but I'm not a writer for Conan and I'm sure they'd be able to make it more sarcastic, and witty, and just overall completely ridiculous. It could work, I'm telling you!

On that note, I leave you with this - It's a replica of Taft's tub because the original cracked "while it was being removed from the White House".....yeah, sure it was.



I can't believe I just wrote an entire blog about William Taft. Raise your hand if you remembered that Taft was a President! Two points if you remembered that he was fat.

And lastly....if you rearrange the letters is Taft you get Fatt....with two T's. That's how fat he was.

(Take a drink for every time the word 'fat' appears in this blog)

Come 'ere once.....or twice.....

I have nothing particularly exciting to share, just wanted to make note of a few interesting things I've come across the past few days or so, things one should check out.

First, Kanye West's new album Graduation, namely track 5, 'Good Life'. I also hope all you folks out there in TV viewing land watched the Emmy's on Sunday and caught the hilarity of Rainn Wilson (Dwight on The Office) doing a little head to head with Mr West himself in a rendition of Don't Forget the Lyrics. Singing what you ask? Why, the songs of Kanye West.



Second, a Scottish singer the wonderful Ale introduced me to, whose voice is reminiscent of Gavin Degraw or maybe Ray LaMontagne-ish - who goes by the name of Paolo Nutini. He's fantastic, I would suggest giving "Last Request" a listen first.

Thrice, Prison Break starts again tonight. While the show may be a little far fetched - it does have some good cliffhangers and exciting twists and turns. Even if it's not really your thing - just watch it for Wentworth Miller, no straight woman or gay man will be disappointed.

Quad - www.michaelgoddard.com. The man's art is amazing - I want every piece of it in my rec room whenever I have a house.

and Funf - The Brave One starring Jodie Foster and Terrence Howard. The movie is plain amazing and anything that I say about it will not do it justice. If anything - how can you not want to see any movie Terrence Howard is in?



Ok I s'pose I better finish a few things before I leave this hole. Happy Monday! Tomorrow's another one.......

It's Friday, I'm in love (plug The Cure)

With Zooey Deschanel. Her comedic timing is perfect and she is quite hilarious. Failure to Launch would have been the exact same movie as The Wedding Planner or How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, if it weren't for Ms. Zooey.

Peep these.





They're a little long, but totally worth it. Especially the shotgun scene(s) in part two.

She's also my favorite part of The Good Girl.

In other news, we've been watching Tim Gunn's Guide To Style and upon seeing Episode 1 with Rebecca, I realized that maybe I need this show. Her every day attire was incredibly similar to mine. It doesn't help that I don't have to dress up one bit for work, so I don't own many dress clothes these days. But then as I thought about it more I realized that she didn't necessarily dress bad, or was stuck in some previous decade of horrible fashion - she just wore jeans and tshirts with the occasional pumps, and dressy-ish top now and then. She just needed Tim's list of essential items he believes every woman should have in her closet. It's something like - a white shirt, black pants, alternative sweatsuit, blazer, vibrator....I don't know - its 11 or so standard items. Maybe I should get that list....

...........................

Well, it's not 1999 or 2000

I wanted to write a detailed blog about the atrocity that was the VMA's 2007 - but I'm tired and don't feel like using the brain energy required. But I will say a few things....

First of all - it was announced Britney would be making her big comeback and opening the show. I was actually pulling for the girl - yeah she's gone a little nuts, but I still feel bad for her. And while she isn't the greatest singer - I've always thought of her as a pretty damn good performer. Part of me thought she was going to knock it out of the park...instead she bunted, and then tripped and fell on her way to first. I was disappointed. The whole performance was lackluster, she looked totally un-enthused - and really nervous. That does seem a little understandable considering her present position with the media and all that's going on in her life - but she's been doing this for how many years? If she wasn't ready, she should have waited. I did like the song though, a good dance tune. And though she doesn't have the body circa VMA's 2000, I thought she looked good - she did have two kids, which Sarah Silverman distastefully made fun of afterwards. I think Sarah's funny, I'm usually a fan - but they're innocent kids, they have nothing to do with anything and it was just rude - but I guess that's expected.

Moving on, they changed the entire format of the show - and I don't think it worked. Instead of your normal venue, like Radio City, they held the awards at the Palms in Vegas and had a smaller venue plus different 'parties' going on in several of the suites. They'd cut from suite to suite, then back to the main stage all the while showing parts of performances. There were a lot of performances cut off that I would have liked to watch - but I guess the point of that was to cut the show down to two hours (which they still went over) and put all the performances on MTV Overdrive. All in all, performance wise the only things worth checking out are Britney (just because it's Britney, and you have to see what I mean), Chris Brown and JT, Timbaland and Nelly at the very end. What also struck me as odd was the fact that it's the Video Music Awards, and I think they presented like 5 awards. They need to revisit the VMA's 1999, 2000 and figure out where they went wrong. Yeah the music industry was flooded with a lot of pop, but at least the show and performances were entertaining and they actually gave away awards.



Oh pop music.

They could have done so much with this years show - music is in a really good place right now and there are so many good artists. They blew it!

Go hear to check out Kanye, JT, Timbaland, Rihanna w/ Fall Out Boy, etc.

www.mtv.com/overdrive

11:59:59

"It's not just the 11th hour, it's 11:59:59"



I went with J and Ale last night to see this film at the Oriental, and it was really good. It really made you think. Unfortunately I was never an environmentalist, or paid any mind to how much harm the human race is actually causing this planet. I do have an aunt that was/is always about greenpeace, having a compost pile, and bringing your own canvas bags for grocery shopping instead of using 'paper or plastic' - but I just didn't really care. And obviously that was the thought of most of the population, seeing the state we're in today. The facts were incredibly eye-opening, and it really is up to this generation to start 'giving a shit' and do something to improve the quality of our environment. One of the points that really struck me as amazing came towards the end of the film when David Suzuki was talking about nature, and the environment - and all that it does for us, for free. He mentioned at one time they did a study to try and calculate how much it would cost to replace all that it does with man-made structures and machines; Bees pollenating flowers, trees and plants putting oxygen back into the air, etc. It would cost 35 TRILLION dollars to do what nature does for us, for free. Maybe it's just me, but that's amazing. They obviously talked about global warming how the earth in general is a few degrees warmer - most people think 2, 3 degrees isn't much, and isn't enough to make a difference - but a few degrees is what brought us out of the last ice age. They also had a few creative directors and architects like Bruce Mau and William McDonough speaking in the film about designing buildings and devices that use solar power, and mimick nature to cut down on fossil fuels and other things that are wearing the earth's resources down so quickly.

If you've got the chance, go see this film - or at least look into what it's about. I'm at the stage in my life where I start thinking about raising a family at some point - and need to have an interest in doing something to preserve quality of life. I may not be around anymore by time it's too late to go back and the human race will die off because of it, but I don't want to bring children into a world that's no longer livable.

There are so many more interesting facts and information that I obviously can't cover - so I really do encourage you to see it.

The 11th Hour Trailer

I'm eating my own words

And those words are "I have an amazing immune system."

Yes, just because I said that - I got sick with the death. J was swallowing razor blades early last week and I foolishly said "teehee, I have an amazing immune system, I probably won't get it." Only I forgot to knock on wood while daring to make such a statement. Besides, his never turned into much anyway - but noooo, come Monday morning I had this weezy feeling in my throat and thought nothing of it for awhile. Then it started to hurt, finally around 8pm while watching Mystery and his gang I was slammed with the full on It's-90-degrees-in-my-house-but-im-freezing syndrome, complete with head-to-toe body aches and sore skin. That's right, MY SKIN HURT! I downed Nyquil and hit the sack by 9:30 - didn't help all that much since I was out of commission all day yesterday. However, today it doesn't hurt to have clothes on, my temperature is back down to a solid 98.6 degrees, and I'm here at work (although I am coughing all over my keyboard). I'm hoping I don't get much more phlegmy (there was an unfortunate incident in the shower this morning) and that this sore throat decides to go back wherever it came from SOON.

Have no fear, this is not going to hinder the weekly tradition of Taco Night every Wednesday at the KOC. Usually this meal comes complete with a long island, but I think I will skip that for some water this time 'round.

Wish me luck in that a shard of taco shell will not scrape my gullet on the way down.

Ba de ya - Say do you remember....

Ba de ya - Dancin' in September


Great song, great month. It's finally September. While it is a tad bittersweet since the quickly approaching fall means winter's just around the corner - I LOVE fall, it's my favorite time of year. The comfortable temperatures, wearing scarves, specialty drinks at starbucks (pumpkin spice lattes!), Halloween, the smell of the crisp air, the changing leaves - perfect for taking pictures :-)

And may I say September started off with a bang! A good friend of mine from high school got married yesterday and it was a great time. J and I were pretty excited upon finding out the reception was open bar - full open bar! Apparently money grows on trees on the groom's side and they like to share. But I guess the curse that comes with a full open bar is that no matter how hard you try to take advantage of it, you cannot get drunk! It was insanity - we each had like 8 spotted cows and 3 shots in a matter of 2 hours or so and we couldn't even catch a buzz! In the long run I guess that was a pretty good thing since then we didn't have to take a cab home - AND it's better to be unable to get drunk off 938547 free drinks than ones you paid for - no wasted money! But we still danced the night away and got to see some of my friends I rarely get to see anymore. Though, they didn't play the one song I requested :( But all in all a great success. I'll post some pictures when I get some.

Also, my weather widget didn't lie and this weekend has been beautiful - perfect weather for a four day weekend! Ah yes, another reason I love the coming of fall - Labor Day - a mini vacation!

TaTa for now - I'm off to eat a bratwurst....and drink a beer....or 7.